Wednesday, June 26, 2019

some kind of magic

It was too good - it couldn't last

this is a public response to a private letter
(for the record... and these files)


Well girl... you found me...

Now what?

Pick up where we left off...

Watching you walk away... to go back to him – whoever he was... I never knew and I never cared... the only thing that mattered was what was real when you were with me... if it was real at all... and at this phase of my life... I don't care any more to know... because these days I don't know what's real anymore any way...

But you played a good game... we made some fine love... and when we locked ourselves away in my little room there was nothing outside our universe and the world we created... only God could make it any better... but as you reminded me... you had to leave... and as you remind me... I had nowhere to go and nowhere to be... what good could I have been to you outside that room?

But as I have told others that find their way here – you never got a chance to see me shine... but yeah... maybe I have just hit my prime... so here I am... and as you may have guessed... I am very much the same man... I have no real ambition... but life has gotten easier... and I can afford to not care and just lounge around... there is plenty and nothing to worry about except how to keep it... just saying... I'm the same ass-hole I was before I got it... I am still – apparently... worthless... outside the bedroom... but I have you to thank for those skills in a big way...

You taught me how to fuck... you know what I mean... it's all we did – for three days – some times four days straight... every man should get so lucky to find a girl like you – but you found me, that's right... and you left when the thrill of it all was over for you... or something like that – doesn't matter –

no...

I do not think bad about you – the only memories I have of you are - sex... what else was there... I can barely recall our conversations... what the hell did we talk about in those moments between the love making...?

I have never spoken of you – though I have made references to the girl that taught me how to fuck... never mentioned you by name and never acknowledged you publicly until now – and I have thought of you often... even after having sex with other women... because the move I had just used on her to drive her into an orgasmic mental break down – I had mastered with you – respect...

I can only smile when I think of you – I hope you feel the same way about me...

 so...

Let's just leave it as it ended... going our different ways... with nothing left behind but the fading echoes of the love we made in that little universe on Grand Avenue...