Saturday, December 31, 2016

the fine art of lounging with Dash Deringer

My mornings are taken up mostly with a lot of this...
but when that is over and I have nothing to do or don't have the motivation to go out and laugh at the new world faggots of the modern world or I am not hiking up a mountain or rolling down that mountain... then my time is invested in doing mostly this...
I also spend a fair amount of time scheming... which many may mistake as brooding... though I do tend to do a lot of that as well... but mostly it's the scheming... but because many parts of my body are in constant pain I do not smile and it forces a look of deep concentration on my face... but it could also sometimes be the brooding...


and then of course it could just be that I wish to be left alone because...
no fucks given..
Happy New Year.

Thursday, December 29, 2016


as for the coming year...
the time has come for you sons of forgotten dragons to rise from your slumber and take back what belongs to you...

Thursday, December 22, 2016

Merry Christmas

That Christmas was a long time ago but it was a good one.

Thank you all form coming by to visit this little site... thank you for your comments and your e-mails, and your friendship.

I wish you all the very best in the coming year and that the blessings of our father in Heaven be abundant in your lives... Merry Christmas.

Dash Deringer
(but you can call me Victor)

Tuesday, December 20, 2016

In the Land of the Savage

a fiction (kinda')
this started out a s comment for the post
by Jack Ronin

There is a place where only a savage dares to go. A place far from the soul killing crowds of a city and the dream destroying beast of traffic, where there are no cell phone towers and internet...  no electric light, no running water from a tap, no coffee shop with over priced stimulants and pretentious self proclaimed intellectual do-gooders competing to apologize for their ethnicity and deny what is left of their culture and abandon any thing that resemble traditional gender identity...

That place where only a savage dares to go lays deep in the stillness of a lonely forest lit only by the streams of light that found a passage through the thick leafy blanket floating under skies filled with so much blue that jet liners could not penetrate them.  In this lonely place the traffic scurries around a bush and scampers up a tree.  In this land of the savage the sound of the city is replaced by the song of the wolf at night and the robin looking for the day light to break through the branches.  In the land of the savage there is no over paid, ungrateful bureaucrat waiting for you to kiss their ass for a building permit or license... you simply pitch your tent and gather up wood for your fire.  There is no rush tomorrow to catch your train or bus or beat the other monkeys to get on the fast lane... you will rise with the rest of the creatures of the wild... you’ll eat when you get hungry and rest when it pleases you... wander about with no agenda and explore this world of green and brown, of stone and soil, rivers and hills and hidden dips in the terrain that lead to other hidden places.  You chase the deer and the fox and try to learn the song of the blue jay and the call of the raven.  You swim in natural waters and wash away the stench of the modern world and contemplate the name of God as you float on your back and try to remember what it was like to rely on another for money to pay your rent and keep food on your plate until you begin to deny such a life could ever have existed let alone had been the sort of life your creator intended for you - for you are savage and you belong in bare feet or at the very least, footwear you fashioned for yourself from the skins of last nights meal.  You run through the dense brush just to see how fast and how far you can go before you turn back around to try to find your way back to  camp - but if you don’t make it back for a couple of days - you don’t care, because there is no one there to care about you - for you are savage and you belong to the moment and destiny’s reward is honor, and glory is the drink she pours in the cup for the man that lives his life without fear. 

You are savage and you hunt the bear and the antelope with spear and sling, with bow and arrow, with stealth and patience, with steady heart and painted face - for you are savage and you belong to the deep forest mist and the smoke and  the ash and the blood and the sweat of natures initiation and the music of the dance is the chant of the nymphs and the sprite and the daughters of Phaleg beating on drums and ringing bells... you are the prince of the Oak and the priest of Atlanteia’s altar, the marshal of green valleys and the strength in the hickory spear.  Your crown is a garland of ivy and your robe the coat of the white bear.  You are the whisper of Autumn’s last breath and  the shadow of Jegudiel... You are savage, chief of forgotten angels, master of outcast demons, your tribe is the rain and the fire, the wind and the hail, the thunder and the lightning. Your brothers are Azrael - the giver and taker of life, Abaddon - the destroyer, Apollo  - the sun of pagan Zues... you were born to tear down the world you were born into and build a better one in your image, to conquer the lands of other savages and build your temples over theirs as they built over the temples of the savages they once conquered...

You are savage... the dance of fire waits for you... the hunt is calling you... the quest for glory saves a place for you... the thunder in your heart is the legion anticipating your return to the field of battle... the restless tilting of your soul is the howling of steal waiting to be forged for your brutal swing at the chaos of the progressive civilized world... that big empty hole inside longs for a fight that pushes you to the edge of dishonor... a brutal, ruthless, barbaric war that fuels the hungry lust for blood of Satan himself... a fight that raises demons and calls down angels and all manner of wandering spirit in between... that pounding pain in your head is the thundering echo of rage struggling to be unleashed on the ungrateful, lazy, obese, self-entitled weaklings that only consume and leave nothing but their filth and the waste of their consumption to pile onto the landfill that is their cities.

The land of the free man is the land of the Savage and if you dare wander into it all that is required is faith in yourself, a belief that God has filled you up with thousands of years of instinct waiting to come out, a sharp knife and a strong axe, a little imagination and skills enough to keep you warm and out of the elements, the will to feed yourself... but just in case, pack some beef jerky and matches. 

You are here because a savage up in your family tree had the will and the balls to travel to a new world and conquer for himself a woman to have children with.

The path of the free man - the Savage, is not an easy one, for it requires you to let go of your fear - fear is the thought of losing that which you think you need - money, a home, a car, a job, belonging, approval... all of it, and when you have let go of the things you think you need, you are free from the world and reborn a Savage  - the destroyer, giver and the taker of life, the son of the pagan, who’s glory is only  outshone by the sun.

Welcome back... Savage.

Tom Lovell

Saturday, December 17, 2016

the girl in charcoal

Trying to conjure up a woman's face from my memories is a struggle... they seem to have all faded into a blur left behind in a hang-over... some of those girls were quite lovely creatures and the ones worth remembering, unfortunately have also gotten lost in the haze - Carmen, the best one out of all of them still lurks in the shadowed corners of my mind but her face is now beginning to fade... see, I kept no photographs of any of the girls  - I never even asked for pictures and I never took pictures of any of them... well... there are pictures of Kelly that I kept, but I can not say for certain why... Carmen made off with lots of pictures of me and found an opportunity to snap some more every chance she could, but I have no pictures of her - she always wanted to give me pictures of her but I always said no - I don't know why I did not want pictures of her, maybe I knew I was going to hurt her the way I did and did not want to be reminded of her, but I have thought of her everyday since I threw her away... Carmen was in a competitive aerobics team and had an amazing body and face to match, and the pictures she always wanted to give were very provocative bordering on pornographic which I thought was funny for a girl that was a virgin when I found her...(?). 

I left all the photographs of Veronica behind when I left Asuncion and there is no evidence of her in my life except for the ghost of her and the echoes of her whispers that still linger in a lonely corner in my soul... Franky hid away the proof of that romance in a box at the bottom of a closet.

Dagmar Left last night for her fathers house for Christmas... she won't be returning... not to me... but she too made out with a lot of things that belonged to me - notebooks, drawings, and pictures of me when I was at my best... and she left behind letters and drawings of her own and pictures of her growing up while I was away trying to figure out my life... her life has been planned out and she and I  both know that her family has hopes of a future marriage with a better, more important man than I... who am I to get in the way of another mans dreams? 

No, there is very little proof left in the world of the women I charmed and seduced and abused in my world... women I recklessly abandoned and the ones I took for granted... very little indeed... and I can't remember what they looked like let alone most of their names... what a waste of good fucking...

What will I leave behind to prove to the world that I even lived at all if I have no sons... and have no city to build for them... what?


Wednesday, December 7, 2016

GRATITUDE (rule 43)

I have been corresponding lately with new friends  - and potential tribesmen. One of them (we’ll call him Brutus), in his latest e-mail wrote:

“You have told me several times and you have said on your site to be grateful, but it was not on your list of rules to live by.  So should we be grateful? Or did you just forget?”

To Brutus and all other young men that stumble upon these 42 Rules to live by - they are my rules to live by... you need to create your own rules to live by, your own creed, your own philosophy of life.  You need to define your own success, your own morals, your own meaning of dignity.  Only you can determine what integrity is for you and draw the line between how far you will go to achieve the life you want without surrendering your honor and your dignity and only you can decide on a life of honor, which is not an easy life, or a life with the rest of the cattle, which is a much easier life - until the day of the slaughter.

I have tried for  a few years now to live my life according to the Lord’s 10 Commandments, aside from the Commandments,  I have put these rules together for me, to help keep me on the path toward the man I have chosen to be - If you choose to be no one of importance to those you leave behind and leave no legacy for them - rules to govern your life by are really  not important - follow the crowd and do what others do... go to work, get drunk, try to get laid... play games and watch your regularly scheduled programming... pass out for the night without having learned anything of value and not having done anything to improve your life and make something better of yourself and the world you live in... doesn’t matter to me, see - the more people we have dependent on us, the more power we have over you... and there it is.


I learned long ago to be grateful for all that I have and all that I have earned and acquired through hard work, paid for in blood, sweat, my honor, my dignity and  my sanity, that now, being grateful for every little thing that may seem insignificant to the outside world,  is just a part of life, it is a part of my being that I no longer think about it - I pick up a discarded coin from the street and I whisper a little thank you to my God... I get a check in the mail and I light a candle to the Lord in Humble gratitude... I give thanks for my crew by giving my friendship and loyalty in return... I appreciate the food on my plate as I savor it slowly and ask the creator to bless every swallow.  When you are grateful for everything from the very small to the great accomplishments of your life you will truly be blessed with more of it... I am grateful for beautiful art that I see and I have been blessed to be surrounded by more of it... I am grateful for the money I have earned and I have been blessed by receiving more of it in abundance... I am grateful for the friendships I have made and I am being blessed  by attracting more friends to me... I am grateful for all the opportunities that the universe places in my path and I am blessed by stumbling upon many more of them...

There is a time to be humble in life and that time is in the ways you express gratitude... it is in the sincerity of the way you simply say “thank you”.

Do it long enough the right way and it becomes like breathing... you don’t have to think about it - you simply just do it.

The Ungrateful

For a very long time I worked in the food service industry - and I did it all. Some days, when I was a waiter, I made no money and I was just pissed off, either because we had no customers or I made absolutely no tips for my service (they say it builds character).  It was an older person that I worked with that first showed my what gratitude means and I truly began to study what we call “the Laws of the Universe” - after every tip this person received he wold fold the money and hold it in the right hand and with it do the sign of the cross and kiss the back of the thumb... every single time without fail... and this person, I began to pay attention, never got stiffed and had clientele that would not set in any other waiters section other than his... so I began to do the same, but nothing happened until I showed honest sincerity in my actions, then my attitude changed and the money flowed and my position in the business began to rise... but for the most part outside of that I had always been ungrateful for anything... and I never cared and I was greedy - and not in a good way... I wanted more but I had done nothing to earn it - I felt entitled but I had no right s to entitlement, neither by birth or by conquest... I was just, at one point, jealous and greedy and lacking in morals, values and direction... but life has a way of kicking a man in the dick just when he needs it.

I was never really thankful for having food to eat until I had no food to eat, never grateful for having a home until I had nowhere to live, never grateful for my little car until I had to sleep in it and then I was grateful I was not huddled behind a dumpster... I’ve lost it all, a couple of times and it made me angry and bitter but the second time -  I humbled myself before the Universe and tried to figure out how I got into this situation and I accepted the fact that my choices and my mistakes got me here... and it would be my attitude that would determine where I go from there - for at one point I was ready to just give up and stay in the abyss and loneliness of failure, but my selfish greed spurned me on, and what little honor and dignity I had left would not allow me to beg for money - though I disgraced my self by stealing... I humbly asked for another chance and if given that opportunity I would prove myself and I would do something better than what I had done before, I would make something better of myself and give back for every good thing that I get... the Universe heard me and began to place opportunities to prove myself in my path - but I did not pay attention at first, though once I caught on, it became a game and I was on my way to winning... but be aware, for everything in life is a test. And life can very easily kick you in the dick once more and laugh in your face without giving a goddamn about you and your dreams and your feelings... and take it all away

I asked for an opportunity and I got it - and I gave thanks. Times have gotten tough but it helped me find out who I am and what I am made of - and for that I gave thanks.  I worked hard and lived below my means and sacrificed friendships and relationships and having fun to have enough to live well later - and for that I give thanks.  Men came into my life that tried to teach me about the world and life, about money and women and the power of the human mind, and I may have been a poor student - but for them I give thanks.

I have heard people say they have nothing to be thankful for... though they have a job and home and nice possessions.  The United States is a country where the poor are fat and have cell phones, but they have nothing to be grateful for, where people can be taken care of from the cradle to the grave if you know how to fill out the right paper work, but they have nothing to be grateful for, where people are allowed to burn the flag and spit on the service of those wounded and killed to allow them to burn that flag, but they have nothing to be grateful for.  The United States is a country where the weak are protected by the strong, but they have nothing to be grateful for, where the lazy and the poor are supported by the generosity of those that can afford to give, but they have nothing to be grateful for.  

My mother’s name is attached to a scholarship fund of a local university along with that of her late husband’s and not once has she received a thank you letter from anyone who has benefited from that scholarship, nor did her late husband receive any such letter.  I suppose these students feel they have nothing to be grateful for since they did themselves earn said scholarship - but if that scholarship was not there for them to help pay for their education... what would they do.  My mothers late husband was under no obligation to set up that scholarship fund - it was his way of expressing gratitude for his successful life and wanted others to be able to learn to play and create music (which is what the scholarship is for), because he enjoyed it so much - he just wanted to humbly and sincerely say thank you for the music.

The greediest people I know are the angry, intolerant, lazy, envious youth of America, who want more, without having earned it, without having paid their dues and not having accomplished anything... that is true greed... and truly ungrateful behavior.  Want to see more ungrateful behavior, look no further than countries taking in third world refugees and see how they ask for more and give nothing in return - see, refugees do not volunteer to join the military and serve their host country to show gratitude - or do they... not many illegal emigrants joining the army to show gratitude to their new country - or are there?

More, more, more... give me, give me, give me... mine. mine, mine... You don’t have to be grateful for anything... you don’t have to express gratitude if you don’t want to - I don’t care, it makes no difference to me - I can only tell you what I do and how I do it and what works for me, I can only make suggestions - it is up to you to do what you want with the information I give you - you don’t have to say thank you... I consider it giving back - it is an expression of my gratitude when I try to help others that ask for it... but I don’t care what you do afterwards.

I have learned how to make money, I do not have to beg - for that I am grateful.

I have learned how to take care of my self and I have learned  to be prepared - for that I am grateful.

I have learned about women and I can get laid - for that I am grateful.

I have learned the power of the mind and the secret to bend the Universe to my will should I chose it - and for that I am grateful.

I have learned that the world needs more men like me in it more than we need the world - and for that I am grateful.
Rene Gruau